Ho, ho, ho-kay!

The time came to give the ol' man in the red suit a visit. Evan was pumped and ready to go. He put his brave face on and at the last second, he choked. Bawled like a baby and I had to sit there next to him in order to get a picture. We were the last ones of the evening and so we had to wait to see the prints. Santa was asking everyone what their requests were and Evan grumbled, with out making any eye contact, "A Wii and a monster truck." Oh, what do we have here? Mr. Smarty loosened up. Of course, Norah sat so obediently and rattled off her list. Santa asked for Colin back and we got a picture, sans screaming children. Unlike this this year.

Successful visit to Santa - CHECK!

Colin's Story- Epilogue

Just so you know... I didn't write Colin's story to receive accolades or compliments. My reasoning was three-fold. 1) So many people asked just what had occurred. This was the easiest way to tell the story once. 2) I use my blog as a journal for my family and I needed to purge these feelings. 3) I was at church and I heard a woman in the hall complaining about a child. The child was a perfectly healthy child, but had some hard knocks that he was trying to work through. He needed all the help that he could to become a healthy, well adjusted individual. As I walked my pained baby trying to calm him, I did everything I could do to restrain myself from punching her in the face. It sounds a little melodramatic, but my emotions were on overdrive and I would have killed at that moment for Colin not to hurt and have some sort of normalcy. This became my forum.

Let me tell you what I have learned through this.

I have learned that I am strong. I never saw myself as that person. Jason and I would comment when we saw people with disabled or sick children that "I could never do that." Guess what? We are. I found found strength in my marriage, my faith, my family, and also those around me who are constantly lifting me up and bearing my burden. Many of you do not realize that simple acts of kindness brought me up from the depths of despair. I was driving in my car one day and a friend called because she just was thinking of me. We chatted and I never told her that at that moment I wanted to crawl in bed and melt away for awhile. If you ever have an inkling that someone needs you, act. Thank you to all those who may or may not have recognized that inkling and acted...

I have also learned to love greater. There are no bounds for the love in my heart. My children are amazing examples and they have been extraordinary through this. I can't imagine how hard it is for them to comprehend all that has gone on. Yet, they just love that baby beyond comprehension. Nothing is unusual about their baby "eating" from a tube. They cheer him on and love on him. It is amazing how one little heart can occupy so much love.

I have learned that there is no "normal." Normal is what you make of it. This is our normal.

I have always known, but have learned even more that laughter is the best medicine. After we found out how bad Colin's little eyes are, I was leaning over him nose to nose. I started whispering sweet nothings to him and he grabbed me face and started feeling around my eyes and nose and mouth. I told Jason to look at our little Helen Keller. Maybe a little inappropriate, but we laughed until we cried. A good cry. So many times, we found ourselves at the point of crying and we just blurted out something funny. It healed our spirits. When they had to clean out his system with a product called, "Go Lytely," my dear friend reminded me of a local attorney named Chad Golightly. We then referred to the process as, "The Chad." I cannot see one of those commercials now and not bust out laughing. Laugh, laugh, laugh... it is truly cathartic.

I have learned to appreciate every milestone. You take for granted all the little things that our babies and children accomplish. You could have hear the cheers from miles away when Colin lifted his head while on his tummy for the first time. Focused on my face and actually saw my features and smiled. Rolled from his tummy to his back. Aaaaaaalmost rolled from his back to his belly. Sat up for a few moments unsupported. I must say, all these things are a little sweeter when you are not sure if and when they are even going to happen.

I have learned to be more thankful. In this season that we are embarking on, being thankful is at the forefront. We are each dealt that life changing moment(s). This has been ours. I look around at the incredible people that I have been blessed to surround myself with. I look at their crosses to bear and realize that even though this road is long and will continue to go on for miles upon miles, I have a prize. That is my sweet Colin- my prize.

I have learned my Heavenly Father has a hand in everything I do. He has followed me, carried me and loved me. I learned that challenges aren't bad things. They are put there to refine us, make us stronger and better. It doesn't matter what situation you find yourself in... there is something to gain. We aren't left out there to flounder and struggle. We are loved.

I learned that my little baby is one of the strongest spirits I know. He is a fighter. A sweet, little fighter, but a fighter at that. If I only had a pinkie full of the strength that he has, I could take on the world. I am ready to see where this life takes him. No matter the challenges, he will be an inspiration and beacon of hope to many people. He is ours... our Colin Reed.

My sister said that she couldn't wait to see what the new tag line on the blog was going to be after all the dust has settled.

Laughing harder, loving better, cherishing the moments... enjoying the ride!